Starting a Book I’m Not Sure Will Be Any Good—But That’s Not the Point

That may not mean much to you, but to me, it means a lot. (referencing the title)

I didn’t do much as a kid. When I was running around outside, or either drawing or reading. Eventually, I got a Nintendo DS at one point and I played that occasionally. But it would only hold my attention for so long. I played other systems but the Nintendo DS was my very own. So I played it alot when I first got it. Held onto it for a long time. It wasn't until I discovered the game The Elder scrolls Oblivion that I really found a long term love. But that's a different post entirely. You see though I always kept coming back to reading or drawing back then when a good tv show wasn't on. 

I read a lot back then. Mostly fantasy, but I also got through most of the Goosebumps series. The ones I had access to, anyway. But it was mainly fantasy. Harry Potter, Twilight, The Merlin Trilogy, The Demonata Series—just to name a few off the top of my head. It was a way to watch TV without actually needing a TV.

Drawing, in a way, was very similar.

It wasn’t until I saw my first episode of Dragon Ball on TV that I really got into drawing. I remember clearly trying to draw Goku back then. I had a stepbrother at the time, a bit older than me, and I remember seeing him draw once too. It made me so happy to know someone else liked drawing. Though I don’t think he stuck with it, that was a long time ago now.

I never really thought about writing a book. But I do remember writing for a girl I had a crush on, or passing notes with friends back in school—and sometimes it was fun to get creative with that. In college, I took a creative writing class, and honestly, that was my favorite kind of English class. I learned grammar by actually trying to write something myself. They’d give us a topic and have us write about it.

I got a compliment one time from the teacher’s aide, and honestly, it was the nicest thing. Now, over 12 years later, I realize she may have been trying to start a conversation—maybe even hoping I’d ask her out. I was, of course, completely dense. She was giggling way too easily over a short story I wrote last-minute with almost no editing... but I digress.

I’ve thought a lot about writing a book.
I’ve thought a lot about a lot of things in the past three years—I sort of had to.

Writing a book became one of those things. But I wasn’t even sure what I wanted it to be about. Truth is, I spent so long thinking about the idea of writing that I never actually came up with an idea. I just kept circling around a bunch of interests.

One of those interests: audiobooks. Specifically, LitRPG.

I’ve listened to tons of them. Some are good, some are bad—but they all share one core concept: leveling up and getting stronger. This gets portrayed in all kinds of ways, and it's so fun to experience characters growing in structured worlds. The rules and systems help make things feel real, even while telling emotionally rich stories. The variety is wild.

So I thought, why not create my own LitRPG?

It started with a randomly typed-out blurb I made about a frog character who wants to grow stronger in a world full of humans and other humanoid animals like himself. This world has a vast power scale that’s slowly revealed over time—like many LitRPGs. My novel is inspired by the idea of personal growth. The first book is an adventure about learning, fun, and becoming more than you were. A wide, mysterious universe... or so it begins.

The character was inspired mostly by the fact that I like frogs (and other animals too). It all grew from a character I made and rendered in Blender. You can see the first post about this here: 

How a Simple Frog Turned Into a Wizard with a Purpose

That’s how it started. Since then, I’ve created a new model that allows for more customization and animation. I’m still refining the look, and I plan to make a future post about the new model and how I’ll use it—and other characters—in what I’m planning on building.

At the time of this writing, I have one full chapter and part of chapter two finished.

I’m struggling between the creative urge to just spill my mind onto the page versus thinking carefully about the direction of the story. It helps to not force the process.

Sometimes I feel like drawing.
Sometimes I want to work on 3D modeling.
And sometimes, I just want to write.

But writing like this—right now—is different than writing for a story. That’s something I’ve come to understand. This, right here, feels natural. I’m just dumping thoughts onto the page. But when I sit down to really craft a story—typing it all out—sometimes that part isn’t easy.

Is it possible? Absolutely.
But forcing yourself to create when you’re not in that mode... it’s tough.

I’ve been learning that it’s important to recognize when you're in the zone. That laser focus. When you lock in and suddenly 4 hours are gone and you’ve created something. That’s when you understand what the flow feels like—and how to nurture it.

Being able to set up your space, take a breath, pace around, move weird, whatever it takes—doing that intentionally can help you get into that flow. Not everyone has the luxury to do that, I know, but if you can learn to spot those windows of focus, you can learn to catch them when they come.

So yeah... I’m going to write a book.

Because why not?

You can sit around and think about it forever—and honestly, some people should do that more often—but you still won’t get anything done if you don’t start. Take a break. Chill. Find your moments. And if you’re not finding those moments, ask yourself why.

That’s what I did. And now I’m building something that lets me be as creative—or introspective—as I want to be.

Am I a broke artist looking for new income streams? Sure.
But who isn’t looking to make a little more money?

So yeah. Will I eventually finish this book and self-publish it?
Yes. Absolutely.
But for now, it’s another project I’ve started—something I’ve always wanted to do.

So with that said, take breaks. Explore other things when you’re not feeling it. Let creativity come to you naturally sometimes. And also—write stuff down more. I’m saying this to you, the reader, but also to myself.

Write it down. Because sometimes you just want to live life.
And it’s good to look back later and see where your head was at.
It helps you understand where your mind is now.

Don't stress about the timing of it or when you should or if your ready. If you aren't sure what to do in that moment where you just having a blank mind. Try writing, or if you write a lot try drawing something. It can be something right in front of you to sketch or whatever your mind comes up with. Doesn't matter if its good or bad. Its the act of trying different art forms that can help in other creative aspects.

Always draw and never write? Take one of your drawings and come up with a creative backstory. Don't want to do either? Go for a walk outside. And just let your mind wonder.  

One key point to take away from this blog post is patience and exploring different forms of art and how they can relate.

But yeah... I’m going to write a book.

and create so much more...

Anyways thank you for reading this rant about a guy who wants to write a book someday but instead types up this post. 

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